First date – what to talk about!


You’ve finally made it! The person you’ve been crushing on asks you on a first date. I hope you met them in person because that makes your job a lot easier.

With the advent of online dating, it’s hard to keep track of what you discussed with that person online. Now you’re on a date and you can’t remember which Dave is sitting in front of you. This is a problem for another blog post…

For now let’s stick to what to talk about and *not talk about on a first date.


What to talk about on the first date?

At first (pun intended) you have to talk about the usual pleasantries like asking about their day or weekend. Once that runs out the conversation should flow if you both have a connection. Here are some quick things  you can ask:

1. Tell me about your family.

This is an important question to ask – by knowing about someone’s family you can know a lot about them. It’s good to get a feel of who this person is by learning about how/where they were raised.

2. What are you looking for in a relationship?

While this may seem a bit forward, we all know that wasting someone’s time is stupid. You don’t have to phrase it exactly this way, but it’s good to know if someone is in this for one night or possibly forever.

3. What was the last place you traveled to? Where do you want to travel next?

When you ask this question you can figure out that person’s sense of adventure and see if you’re both on the same page. Everyone loves a good vacation so you’re bound to have some crazy/funny story from using that good old PTO.

4. If you had to eat one kind of food for the rest of your life what would it be?

Don’t be afraid to ask something unexpected or silly. It’s good to catch the person off guard with an interesting question that could spark a new and great conversation!

It’s not just you, at some point there will be a pause in conversation.

This is just natural human behavior! You might feel awkward, they might feel awkward, but I’m telling you right now you don’t need to. It happens to everyone, in almost any situation! If you get nervous just go to the bathroom and collect your thoughts.

What NOT to talk about on a first date?

I don’t want to give you a long list of things to not say on date. You should feel free to talk about whatever subject you want, as long as you feel comfortable doing that! There are some topics that are better suited for later on in the relationship.

1. How much money do you make?

This question is too forward for a first date. While later on you should probably know how much your partner is making, in the beginning this can give someone the wrong idea. It could leave the impression that money is all you’re interested in.

2. Do you have STDs?

This should be a no brainer, but don’t ask this on a first date! I do encourage you to ask this later on, of course.

3. Negative topics!

It’s a first date so keep it light a positive. I wouldn’t suggest bringing up death, dying or depressing things. So, avoid those 3 Ds!


The Social: Modern Matchmaking is always here to help with first dates! When we do our consultations, we are doing the first date for you by learning about all of our clients. In this way, we can hopefully avoid awkward dates where you don’t have a good time.